Monday Blues

Today is one of those days that I woke up and dont  feel good, but I can’t figure out what exactly is wrong. Ramadhan was great, this weekend was a whirlwind of activities so maybe I’m just feeling the let down that comes with the withdrawal of all that andrenaline.

I’ve embarked on a sort of spiritual journey, will create a separate page for those posts (if I ever get round to blogging about them that is)I have begun to ask questions about my faith that I never thought to ask. It’s been scary especially the fact that I feel like the outcome an be only two extremes I either stop believing in God entirely or my faith is strengthened to a point where it’s unshakable. So I guess it’s worth a try.

On the baby front, turns out we were pregnant(yay) but then I did miscarry so we have started tests all over again. I’m not bugging about it though. We started looking at adoption as a real option, it something we’ve both always wanted to do but we figured that would be later in our plan. Turns out its amazingly difficult to adopt legally in my country. There are lots of shady people though who are willing to offer you a baby for a price. When we do decide to adopt it will be a struggle.

Here’s a question for you guys, do you think men are naturally polygamous? Had some friends over and it was a hot topic, would love to hear your views. Have a great week

Fingers Crossed.

“Let’s do a pregnancy test.” Me blank stare. But you really can’t argue with your doctor can you? Turns out the doctor knew what she was on about. Yes we were are pregnant because apparently I’ve been having a miscarriage and I had no idea.

I will know by tomorrow if the pregnancy is still ‘viable’. But right now I’m over the moon because I had been told there was no way we could get pregnant without help and here we are 🙂 this feels like ten steps forward.

Whatever the outcome tomorrow, the future looks good and I am truly grateful


Warning! This post might contain TMI.
So I had a hospital appointment on Monday . Earlier in the day,I had spent hours at the bank trying to get my ATM card and spent some time in traffic before I finally arrived the hospital already feeling out of sorts. So I tried to settle down while I waited my turn and the nurse called my name. I go into the consultation room and she’s trying to take a sample. So here I am on the table, legs in the air with this woman attempting to insert a metal object inside of me. It was uncomfortable to say the least, but then what got on my nerves was the nurse constantly saying “Madam, just relax.” I’m like seriously?! Relax?! Like how the heck am I supposed to ‘relax’ in this postion? Anyways after another couple of minutes she finally succeeds in her ‘quest’ and gets the sample she needs. But she’s still very disgruntled that I did not ‘relax’ on command.

Now for someone who has been TTC for a while, I’m used to all kinds of tests, pricking, prodding, flushing, you name it I’ve done it. So I’m no shirking violet when it comes to hospital visits. I also appreciate the fact that nurses and doctors see a lot of patients each day and sometimes monotony seems to set in and they forget they are dealing with people. I have had some of the most insensitive comments come from my doctors since my ttc journey began and it always shocks me because I just assume if no one understands what im going through my doctors will. So I was very upset at this nurse who expected me to get up on a table spread my legs and ‘relax’ during a procedure thats extremely uncomfortable, even if it was a procedure I had done a hundred times before.

I let the nurse know that while I understood the fact that she might be tired and want to get her sample as quickly as possible, commanding me to relax on makes me more uncomfortable and resentful of her. Which doesn’t help either of us in the long run. Maybe I was being too sensitive because I had a long annoying day but I still feel like the nurse should have been nicer or at least apologised.

What do you think?